Category Archives: Unwarranted Libel

Ignore this Fantasy Primer, Part II: Nationals That You Should Make Someone Else’s Problem

This post concludes a fantasy baseball primer on (maybe) your Washington Nationals. Previously, I covered Nationals worth pursuing at practically any level of fantasy baseball play. This installment will run down Nationals that should only employ if you are trying to run your team into the ground.

There is no such thing as a “bust” in fantasy baseball in 2010. Some players, like Russell Branyan or Rich Harden, receive the kid gloves treatment due to their extensive injury histories. Certain fantasy managers avoid these players for said histories. Other players, such as Garrett Atkins or Andruw Jones, are toxic assets, based on their talent that happened to magically evaporate. They earn consideration from fantasy managers based on reputation, but are still largely avoided. All of these players fall under the “bust” umbrella, despite the possibility that they might turn it around in 2010.

That being said, and since I have the floor here – and fantasy season is but a March Madness away – I thought it time to discuss three Nationals that you should avoid if at all possible. I do not pretend for this to appear particularly serious – ain’t no BUH% to see here…

SS Cristian Guzman: Guzman: Fantasy Stats:: Kevin Bacon: Hollow Man.

P Scott Olsen: I understand that the Nats are not exactly National League East contenders. I also understand that the front office values depth when it comes to pitching. After all, Miguel Batista and Shawn Estes are non-roster invitees to Spring Training. Olsen started eleven games for Washington in 2009, racking up a 2-4 record, including a 6.03 ERA, 1.72 WHIP and 1.68 K/BB ratio. Opponents hit .320 against Olsen in 2009. These are red flags. Hell, these are white flags. Whatever color flags you prefer, make sure they don’t involve seeking Olsen for your fantasy team. CHONE has Olsen starting 22 games for Washington in 2o10, to the tune of a 5-9 record, complete with a 5.18 ERA, 1.50 WHIP, and 1.64 K/BB ratio. Olsen will start in 2010 for several reasons: guilt over the Emilio Bonifacio trade (maybe), he’s a million dollar “investment,” no one wants to give the ball to Livan Hernandez…you get the point. The Nationals, at some point in 2010, must start Olsen. Fantasy managers this season have the luxury of avoiding this quagmire.

C Iván Rodríguez: Blasphemer! Heretic! Infidel! I can hear the hounds baying for blood now. The suggestion that the legendary I-Rod is useless in almost all forms of fantasy baseball seems sinful, but for reals. The Nats signed Rodríguez to show the fan base that the front office is unafraid to splurge on a “veteran presence.” $6MM over two years is, to me, about a year and three million dollars too much, but Ted Lerner has reasonably deep pockets. I digress. Last season Rodríguez hit .249/.280/.384 with 10 HR and 47 RBI. Readers – if you’re out there – that’s positively Varitekian. Marcel seems to have the most believable projection for the future Hall of Famer – .258/.295/.393 with 10 HR and 47 RBI – and he has the job security (for what that’s worth) to warrant such production. Rodríguez’s career is truly impressive, including the nine walks he took for the Tigers in 2007, but dudes and ladies. Please do not seek his services. There’s always Rod Barajas or Gregg Zaun.

Presto. Three Nationals your fantasy roster will survive without. This primer does not mean that there are Nationals that do not deserve consideration in the fantasy baseball realm. I only sought to showcase some of the more polarizing cases.

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Filed under Analysis, Gaiety, Uncategorized, Unwarranted Libel

The Elephant in the Room (and it’s not John Boehner)

Man, I really hope we will not have to see this guy in a Nationals uniform this season. That’s all I’m saying.

He’s probably slated to pitch the April 10 game against Jason Bay, David Wright, and the rest of the Buffalo Bisons Mets.

Super.

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Filed under Analysis, Self-Indulgence, Unwarranted Libel